Cheech and Chong Protest the Suspension of Sprinter, Sha’Carri Richardson
It don’t make no sense, man
Marijuana and its ambassadors are having a serious identity crisis with the 30-day suspension of Olympic Hopeful Sha’Carri Richardson from the Track and Field team.
“Shit, man,” said Cheech and Chong, “Now we’ve going to have to remake all our movies. We gotta change our mellow into high strung out.”
Chong has already been promoting CBD for arthritis and isn’t interested in becoming an old tye-dyed hippie again. “Fuck that man,” said Chong. “I’m into Hemp suits and compression socks now.”
Cheech said he's not worried. “I’m sort of a closeted hyperactive guy anyway, man,” said Cheech. “I can smoke marijuana and look like I’m on cocaine.”
“Man,” said Chong. “If Sha-Carri Richardson can win the 100 meters stoned, shouldn’t she get like two medals? Like, one for winning and two for how the fuck do you sprint stoned?”
Cheech nodded off in agreement. “This shit is whack, man. Some producers called us and said we gotta remake all our movies and make pot look like it makes you run fast. The script has us sprinting beside race cars. We’re too old for that shit, man.”
“I can’t do it, man,” agreed Chong. “Why can’t people ever face reality? When did all news become fake? Now, I legally have to say pot is the same as steroids.”
“So true, man,” said Cheech. “But, if you tell people that pot is the same as steroids, they’ll think you’re stoned, man.”